Have you ever wondered if there was a difference between fate and just life happening? Do things really happen for a reason, or do we have some control on where our lives end up? If you think about it, I’m sure you can recognize some of those moments that are hard to pass off as happening out of nowhere. You think there almost had to be a divine connection, or even an encounter that brought you to that person, that place, or even that thing that just seems to have happened at the right time.
The allure of such prospects immediately draws us in before we really count the costs of its presence. Then it’s somewhere down the road that you start to think if what just happened was too good to be true. You start second guessing whether or not what seemed to be so great is even something worth dabbling in. Somewhere along the journey you’ve found yourself on the ever-so-timely question of fate arises. It begs the question, is or isn’t it?
I am not so sure I believe in fate, or better yet things falling in perfect alignment at the perfect time in the most perfect way. However, I do think there are people, places, and things that we stumble over that make life a little more pleasant in the season. When making decisions of finality, I think it’s important to not question if it is in fact “fate” or even something that was “meant to be.” Instead, maybe we should consider timing, how we feel, and what other people around us have to say. While something might look right, it might not be what you need right now. We have to understand that every decision we make has the potential to change and affect everything we do. In the moments we question where our lives are headed, we have to trust that the narrow way will lead us in the right direction.
Why is it that we need something “new” to be motivated to change? It’s that new school, or new boyfriend or girlfriend, oh and my personal favorite – a new year. It’s that time where Christmas has come and gone, and now we begrudgingly begin again life’s daily routine of the hustle and bustle. While we grieve at actually having to resume responsibility again, it doesn’t take long to become re-acclimated.
While getting back into the swing of things comes at almost no cost, it’s the “change” we want so badly that tends to present some problems. Everyone has things they want to improve upon, modify, or even those things they wouldn’t mind getting rid of all together. Yes, I’m talking about the oh-so-infamous New Year’s resolutions we without fail make every year. With only the uttermost passion and determination, of course, do we attempt to take up such a challenge. In what seems like moments of victory we feel invincible, but quickly around the corner comes the rapid defeat I like to call temptation. We soon lose sight of what we set out to accomplish, and here’s to next year to give it another go.
However, change is not impossible. It is rather something always within reach if we so desire. The problem isn’t in the “desire” to change but the reason behind the “desire”. If our motivation is because the “new” feels like an opportunity for a clean slate, as soon as the newness wears off, so does the motivation. Therefore, it’s only when we find a relentless motivation that we stay strong on the course. People will always fail us, and when our motivation is found from them we too will fall off track just as quickly. When we are driven by the person that will never let us down we are sure to always have an abundance of motivation. Don’t lose hope in your goals of change because remember, where there is a will there is a way!
Have you ever found yourself just so sick and tired of being sick and tired? I think it’s something we all experience at some point in our lives. It’s that feeling we wish would just go away but seems to linger in the hallways of our mind for ages.
Drama has a way of doing just that, sucking us in and then spitting us out. We are left battered and torn by the battle of the fight. Many times we make it through stronger but more often we are left scarred by the experience. The lasting effects we secretly wear, hidden until we are forced to deal with them in another relevance. It’s the mistrust, the fear and, of course, the insecurities that plague us in facing the next relationship.
While we are so prone to always want to respond to drama, I have found that the fight solely comes at your discretion. No matter how angry, upset, or willing the other person is to engage in the conflict, it’s all in your hands. There can be NO fight if you choose not to participate. When you choose not to respond, the other person is totally disarmed, left to figure it out by themselves. If they continue, their campaign of bitterness becomes no longer a fight, but rather an attack.
There are always going to be people that are going to want to put you through it, for them fighting seems like the only way they know to deal with their issues. However, if you choose to withdraw your sword, you are left with a better chance at healing the hurts you’ve already experienced. Walking away can so often be perceived as being weak, but to me it’s only the strongest of people that can let go and move on.