If it’s true that we are the only ones that can control our mood, how is it that when we become angry we blow up? Despite any extenuating circumstances, we are ultimately always in control, whether that be happy, sad, or even upset. I find, however, that anger is the hardest emotion to restrain. It’s like some innate switch that someone flips and all rationale goes out the window. It seems to me that no matter how hard you try to monitor the feeling the agitation in essence becomes one in its own.
I wish I could offer some sort of resolution, but I’m not so sure I have figured one out. I think maybe that the beginning lies in the end. Learning to understand the outcomes that result when things get out of control helps the position for next time. Reconciling the pain of the wounds it transpires calls for a better solution.
Remembering, I believe, is important to better understand, but it still seems to not be enough. How many times have you felt yourself start to get angry as the flash backs of the last fight start playing through your mind? Just for a second, time stands still as your thoughts rewind, and in that split second, you painfully regret what you know is about to take place. That overwhelming burst explodes, forcing the cycle to play out yet again.
Love this blog Rach! I totally agree that anger is the hardest to control and the most regretted when we don’t control it. I am learning self-control is the key! Keep writing!
Yes, Anger is worse emotion, just this morning my son and me were in big fight and I used the worst anger words, now I feel awful about it.
Rachel,
What words of wisdom from such a young girl.I am so proud of you.
Michele-
Thanks for your kind words! I always love feedback like that, keep reading!
Rachel,
I enjoyed reading this blog very much! I think too, that “the beginning starts at the end”. I also think your anger is triggered by your fear. People sometimes get angry to shelter themselves from that fear in their life. Just a little food for thought. Keep up the good work!! Thanks for the good read!
I agree! “Speak when you are angry – and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.”
To “begin at the end” and be observing yourself is the first step in building the mechanism to stay in control of your behavior. When threatened or unsafe, we are built for “fight or flight” mode which is very much out of our control. Sometimes the ‘threat’ was really only to our ego and it’s “territory” or will. Our Spirit quickens us when we’ve come to our senses and has a much better perspective that is not based on individualism or “self”. It is not natural for us to be above our survival mechanism. To transcend our nature is supernatural.
Rachel, that was great.
All we have to do is to ask for grace to be able to control our out burts.
God bless you girl.
God knows I have a lot of anger I need to work on.
Yerardi-
I think we all have a hard time when it comes to anger. Hopefully this blog helps bring some insight into the situation. Anger is never easy to restrain but it is possible, especially when we remember how devastating the effects can be towards others.
Rachel, I agree. Anger seems to take over! I try to remember what my Pastor always says. When someone spits in your face and you say, “that really made me mad”. He says “no, that made you WET, YOU made you mad!
I see myself in this blog.
Anger is an emotion that God gave us, but we shouldn’t be lead by it to do distructive things. My Pastor told me that what works for him is to sense that emotion starting to explode like a volcano. When sensed, that’s when we need to get a hold of it! Stop the momentum before the pendelum starts swinging. Meaning get control of it right from the beginning before it has TIME to get out of control. Hope this helps someone. Rachel, thanks for writing about this tough subject.
Yes, I agree we have experienced these emotions but there is a way of escape. Understandablly
this maybe easier for some but I believe God (Holy Spirit) is our helper. Proverb tells us a man(person) that controls their anger is mightier than one that wins a city. The bible says be angry but sin not meaning WE must monitor our actions and reactions. The Holy Spirit will lead and guide us Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for the post
Rachel, you have a beautiful way of writing!
Wow this was a great read. You are right this is a problem for most of us. Anger is very common. I dont think anger is bad. I think how we handle Anger can be bad. I know for a lot of us when we get angry its very easy for us to say bad things to others. I know im bad about when im driving and if somebody cuts me off while driving. The kyle side of me wants to roll up on them and tell them off. But the christrian godly side of me wants to say ok kyle i know they have made you upset because they cut you off and almost caused you to wreck but forgive them like the father has forgiven you. I think James 1:19 should really come into play here.
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.James 1:19 Maybe we can all remember this verse to help us from exploding.
As a pastor and a therapist, I find anger a common problem. Anger is an energy, but a dynamo
switch to losing relationships, jobs, spouses, friends, and life.
Thank you so much Rachel, am leaning a lot of staff from here.
May God bless you.
I am a 52 year old…and I have to say I am learning from you. Your Blog is truly awesome..Keep up the good work. God is truly blessing you.
you suggesting that we remember the consequence of my last outburst gives me the answer I am looking for not just the answer but it’s like I received the grace that comes with restraining power, thanks. God bless you.
please tell your mom and dad I love them.